The Coin - A short story (4)

As we entered the Kooduthurai temple, memories came to me like short waves. At this very temple I expressed my love to Gayathri and received a smile that even the deity at the Madurai Meenakshi Amman could not match. For a year and a half the temple had been a place for our frequent visits. My primary purpose of the visit would only be to be with her and have joyful conversation while for her it was her Shiva, the lord of destruction who had to be attended first. Of the countless lingams situated at various places inside the temple, a tiny one that sat under a Beal tree would receive her dedicated attention and a quarter of an hour of silent worship with the sacred ash and Beal leaves; prior to that a visit to the main deity The Sangameshwara is a must. All this while I would accompany her edgily awaiting the sweet talks I would have with her after her ceremonious round up around the temple.

That evening too, I was waiting edgily for Rama Krishnan to start the conversation, and to be exact I was awaiting the moment he would let me leave. Somehow I got an unpleasant feeling about this meeting. Also I could not get the beggar out of my mind.

Rama Krishnan had gone to buy some Prasad from the temple shop. When he returned his face looked bright. ‘The tamarind rice that is sold here is the most delicious in this town’ he said sitting beside me and offering me a bundle of tamarind rice.

While I was opening the bundle, I could not help but wonder at the sight of innocence present on his face. I felt a tinge of guilt developing in me.

‘Sir, do you still remember that tinopal incident?’ I asked him hesitantly.

‘Oh, yes. How could I forget the very incident that changed the course of my life?’

‘I am extremely sorry sir,’ I said: my guilt conscious ballooning up. ‘It was my entire fault,’

‘No, no, no. Don’t be silly. You did the best you could. You contacted me immediately when you found out you have added tinopal to the lot by mistake. You didn’t try to hide your mistake or put the blame on someone, you know. That’s a noble quality for me. The only mistake you have committed was to forget my instructions. I clearly said umpteen times that it wasn’t a white lot and we shouldn’t add tinopal. But then you were inexperienced. You had been transferred from the laboratory to the bleaching department just a week earlier. You could have been careful. But never mind. It’s all a thing of the past now,’ he said, more intend on the tamarind rice than on the conversation.

I wanted to express myself completely, knowing full well I could not. ‘But sir, it was a night shift and I slept immediately after giving the chemical requirements to the laborer. I forgetfully added two kilos of tinopal and the laborer obliged my instruction while I was blissfully unaware of anything that was going on. Had I been awake that night, I could have avoided the blunder. It was a lot that was meant to be dyed with burgundy color, but I made dyeing impossible by adding the whitening agent. It was ten thousand meters of fabric, sir. I incurred a great loss to the company and the buyer. You took the blame on yourself. I got away with some stern warnings. But it was you who suffered a great deal. You lost your job. The provident fund was denied. As you said, it’s true that incident changed the course of your life, but all because of me.  I feel guilty when I think of you and our company, sir. That was the reason why I tried to avoid meeting you on the earlier occasions even when you insisted,’

‘You know, Mahesh, you had just given your resignation then. If you had accepted responsibility for the slipup, the MD would not have spared you. Your salary for that month would not have been issued; neither would you have got your bonus for that year. Pongal was nearing, remember? I knew the bonus was substantial amount of money, considering the financial trouble your family was undergoing at that time. Not to mention the influence the MD had over the new company you were going to join. He could have ruined your chances of going up in the ladder,’ he said.

‘But sir, the ruination struck you massively.’

‘You think so? No, no. in fact it was a blessing in disguise for me. I always wanted to get rid of this wretched job but did not have the guts to do it. When it came naturally, although I was dumbstruck at first, I felt relieved. It gave an opportunity to reflect back on my own life and made it easier for me to take some important decisions in my life. So, in a way, I am happy that the inevitable happened.’

‘Are you really happy at the moment, sir?’

‘You could say that. One is never happy with one’s life at any point. But I can say I am free of a lot of load at this moment. My pocket is empty; my path is clear; no sidekicks; no masters,’ he said, laughing aloud.

to be contd...